Melania Trump in for Repairs

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An aide of President Donald Trump, (Potus – hippopotamus abbreviated), has mistakenly revealed that his wife, Melania is “in for repairs”.

Melania Trump has not appeared in public for 24 days and it has now been announced she will not be accompanying her husband on two key foreign trips.

The unnamed Aide who was sacked 2 days earlier for his “incompetent gaffe” due to Donald Trumps (Potus-his family were Scottish Potters) newfound omnipotustent abilty to see into the future, allegedly stated via email to the IT department that ” Melania is in for repairs, she’s having a chip added to increase empathy and clothes sense and has a couple of mobility problems in the pistons in her arms affecting hand movement plus the usual “wear and tear down there.”

The IT department replied that they would need to install updated software to ensure “Melania’s functions continued smoothly.”

The President had previously said that he was completely unaware of his wife’s whereabouts and had assumed she was shopping with Kim Kardashian.

The Kardashian family have confirmed that Kim is also “in for repairs” following her recent meeting with President Trump.

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